Ups and Downs

This adoption journey is just full of emotions. Ups, downs, in betweens...sometimes both in one day!

Today is one of those days. Actually, this is one of those weeks. (Coincidence that my "monthly visitor" is here? I think not.)

I was hoping for two things today...An update on the little Miss and an Ethiopian court date. I did get one...an update, and a super sweet one at that.

From an in-country staff member-"This little lady has one of the sweetest dispositions I’ve come across in an infant. Her sweet, wide smile spreads easily across her face when you interact with her. As I was leaving her today, she rolled over on her side, ready for her nap, and her eyes closed. She was all set for sweet dreams. When I patted her on the back to say goodbye, she turned her head slightly my way and smiled her wide gummy smile. Even when she’s nodding off, she still has the grace to be kind!"
Love to hear that!

She is creeping up on her 6 month birthday in a few days. I am so happy that she is happy and healthy and being loved well. But her little monthly birthdays are honestly, REALLY hard for me. I absolutely hate the idea of her getting any older without me (sort of the kind of emotional torment Bella experienced when facing her 18th birthday, realizing she was aging while beautiful perfect Edward, remained 17 forever...ah, Twilight. I digress...) ANYWAY...her birthdays are so hard for me. I want to be with her. I want to be the one she smiles at and generously gives her toothless grins too. I know those grins won't be toothless forever and I want to be there when she gets that first tooth! I want to be there when she sits for the first time. I want to be the receiver of the last smile before she goes to sleep. I am not trying to be Debbie Downer...but I kind of am.

Honestly, I have done really well, so far,  with this wait. I was a freak right before our referral. Anxious...phone on at all times. Then,we saw her. We fell in love. And I've been great since. Patient, and peaceful. Trusting God. I still trust Him, completely. But...today, I am weepy and just absolutely missing her. I read the update, and already her personality is coming out. She's growing, changing, and here we sit, with a diapers, clothes, nursery...all waiting for her. I just want her here. I keep hearing this song float around from Steven Curtis Chapman (which, to warn you, in regards to adoption/waiting all of his songs make me weep).

Lyrics-When Love Takes You In
I know you’ve heard the stories
But they all sound too good to be true
You’ve heard about a place called home
But there doesn’t seem to be one for you
So one more night you cry yourself to sleep
And drift off to a distant dream
Where love takes you in and everything changes
A miracle starts with the beat of a heart
When love takes you home and says you belong here
The loneliness ends and a new life begins
When love takes you in
And somewhere while you’re sleeping
Someone else is dreaming too
Counting down the days until
They hold you close and say I love you
And like the rain that falls into the sea
In a moment what has been is lost in what will be
When love takes you in everything changes
A miracle starts with the beat of a heart
And this love will never let you go
There is nothing that could ever
cause this love to lose its hold
When love takes you in everything changes
A miracle starts with the beat of a heart
When love takes you home and says you belong here
The loneliness ends and a new life begins
When love takes you in it takes you in for good
When love takes you in
for the youtube video click here

It just makes me ache...because we do already love her. We dream daily about her. God has given us a place for her here. We are changed already. We want her.


I'm a teary mess. 

Lord, please, open a court date for us. Pave the way for our sweet girl to be here with us, every day, for years and years to come. I believe that you are bigger than all the full court schedules, needed paperwork and embassy appointments. 

Keepin' It Real...

It has been a really crazy 2 weeks around here. Some special friends going through hard times, the homestretch of hubby's basketball season, 2 preschool age kids...add it all up and you get one tired mommy. With all of life happening around, I've totally slacked on the homefront duties.

I posted a vent on facebook about my dishes and laundry taking over the house, and my amazing friend Julie emailed me and offered to take my boys for the whole day today, so I could get caught up. I almost cried and took her up on it before she had time to change her mind :). JULIE- You are amazing! Thank you!
BEFORE

AFTER

I am so blessed...thank you, Julie!

Not this week...

Well, we officially past the one month mark since our referral. Little Miss is one month older (she is now almost 6 months old). We are so thankful for the Gladney update we recieved a few weeks ago, and for amazing friends who traveled last week and delivered wonderful pictures to us! We are eating them up...Hayden keeps kissing her pictures, declaring her his little "angel"...we'll see how he feels when she eating his Legos, or keeping him up at night, but he's absolutely smitten. Jack is so happy he's no longer the "little brother" and anytime you say "little brother" he's very quick to remind you he is now  a "BIG BROTHER...LUCY'S BIG BROTHER!! I'm NOT a baby. I'm a BIG boy, mama." In those exact words. I think he loves her purely on her ability to up his family status :)

We have been hoping to hear what our court date is, and we know we MUST be getting close to finding out. I was starting to get antsy about it, but the pictures of our girl, and assurance from friends that she is being very well loved and taken care of have really helped. I am really really hoping we'll get to travel by the end of March...and the first March travel dates are already being filled as families pass court. I'm trusting God completely, and praying that he gets us to the girl very soon...we can't wait to meet her!

Good Day

Thanks to my friends Beka and Joy, today was a VERY good day.

They just got back tuesday from Ethiopia, picking up their sweet sweet babes.  In my inbox this morning, I had 8 fantastic pictures from Beka of our sweet girl enjoying her care package from us! (well, truth be told, I'm pretty sure it's for our enjoyment, not hers...she's 5 months old for crying out loud--and oblivious to the white people in the photo album)

She has grown and changed since our referral pics, just a month ago...thicker hair, brighter eyes...she's so darn sweet and has the most beautiful dark chocolate eyes ever. Her ears stick out a bit, in an adorable way.

Joy said she has some pics for me to and said she is "super super sweet"...music to my ears to hear personal descriptions of her! Thank You Thank You ladies! You made my day.

I would like a grande americano, and one court date in Ethiopia, please...

If only the girl at Starbucks could just punch it into her little register, and a magic court date would appear on my reciept. I am SO ready to hear what our court date is!

Come on, phone, RING, already.

HEL-LO referrals and court dates!

the past few weeks have been dragging by for those waiting for referrals and court dates...not much action. BUT the past couple of days have been AWE--SOME!

Yay for these families who got referrals yesterday and today....Bottomlys and Lisa and the Mullins. WOO HOO!!

And, Gayla, who got the call about her court date yesterday! Fantastic week!

I'm happy to say that little mini list I started to the right a month ago of a few families from Gladney who were all in a little cluster waiting for referrals...have all gotten them! Woo Hoo! Bring on the Court Dates!

right now in Ethiopia...

My friends Beka and Joy are meeting their babies for the first time! So excited for them!