Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Heavy Heart

Just before we celebrated Christmas, I heard from a fellow adopting friend, that there is a major infant formula crisis in Ethiopia. I'm copying and pasting a note from her blog below, she explains it better than I.

Anyhow, having just heard this before Christmas...as we were being blessed by so so much good and wonderful things, I kept thinking about the babies in orphanages in Ethiopia. Basically, the currency in ET has lost a lot of value, having a lot of impact on what they can import into thier country. And, as a result, they have not been able to import much needed infant formula. Please Read below. I have 2 friends that I know, who will be traveling to get babies in about 2 weeks. They can take much needed formula (no liquid formula) in thier luggage, and check extra bags full of formula. If each of us donated on can, imagine the difference we could make for hungry babies! For some it's easier to make a monetary donation, and that is fine as well, you can send checks to AGCI noted "formula for Ethiopia" or give it to me and I will personaly buy it and pass along to my friend. It costs $50 per extra bag of luggage, so if you feel led to give in that way, it would be a huge blessing to my friends travelling as well. It seems that is the easiest way and cheapest way to get a load of formula there.

50 pounds of formula looks like this...

I am leaving in less than 2 weeks to pick up my sweet little girl, but my heart is heavy. Ethiopia is facing a critical formula shortage that impacts the whole country, but especially the orphanages.

I borrowed this from Charisa's blog, because she did such a great job explaining it and is heading a formula drive through our adoption agency. Please read and see how you can help.

From Charisa:
Hello friends!
We have recently been made aware of the formula shortage in Ethiopia right now because the birr (Ethiopian currency) has lost value due to the downturn in the Ethiopian economy. Because of this trading with the Middle East, the normal source of formula, has been hampered.
This has resulted in a shortage of formula in the country and more specifically, dear to our hearts, the orphanages. Imagine trying to care for those precious babies and not knowing how you were going to feed them! I cannot fathom the heartache that must be. They are desperate for formula. This comes straight from Almaz, the director at Hannah's Hope.
Some of those same babies that I loved on, specifically at Enat Elam, are becoming sick from lack of formula and being fed powdered milk.
I have talked to Julie, my case manager, about specifically what we can do, here it is:
If you want to purchase powdered formula (no liquid!) , specifically up to about 12 months of age, you can give it to me (AMY). If you are further away, email me and I can give you the address of a traveling family to send it to. We will send this with traveling families as they go to Ethiopia. This is the best way to get it to Ethiopia.
Monetary Donations-- Because God is faithful and we are going to receive an enormous amount of formula (I like to think big with God) and sometimes people would prefer to just give money, we can collect money to help pay for the extra luggage charge to send over with formula with families traveling to Ethiopia. This is the cheapest way to get it there.
As far as monetary donations, they can be marked Formula for Ethiopia and made out to AGCI and sent to address at bottom or you can also give monetary donations to me and I will send them on.
I know that I am always coming to you guys with one cause or another...and I am so grateful for your help each time. I just really want to help these precious babies! It absolutely crushes my heart to think that they are without the formula they need to grow and live. They already have so many odds stacked against them.

If we each just send one can of formula, what a difference we can directly make to those babies!

I can't imagine the pain and heartache the orphanage directors are going through...trying to feed all of those babies and not having what you need to do it. Can you imagine?

All God's Children
3308 NE Peerless Place
Portland, OR 97232
http://www.allgodschildren.org/

Friday, December 26, 2008

journal entry

Today I spent some time praying and reading. I decided to read through Exodus this month (these people were on a BIG journey, many milestones, many hardships, and God carried them through...seemed fitting to me!)
Today, this verse caught my eye...Ex. 14:14-"The Lord will fight for you; you only need to be still". So, I sat and was still and prayed. Here's an entry from my journal today.

12/26/08 3pm
Lord, as I faced Christmas I was overwhelmed at times, with the ache in my heart for our daughter. I don't even know her face yet, Lord, but our family does not feel complete without her. There were a few moments when I found myself with tears in my eyes as I imagined picking out gifts for her along with ones for my boys. My heart longs for her to be here with us. I often wonder about her, where she might be. She is most likely in her mother's womb. Lord, cover them both with your wonderful comfort and protection. Right now, her mother is probably wondering how she will take care of her baby, let alone herself. Lord, I pray that you be preparing her mother's heart for what lay ahead. I pray that you provide for her physical needs as she carries this sweet baby girl. Give her a place of safety to BE, nutritious food to nourish them both. Lord, bless this momma. Give her peace and health. Give her wisdom as she makes choices for both of their futures. Protect our daughter, Lord. Allow her to safely grow and thrive.

Lord-make a way for our finances to come togehter, whatever way possible. WE trust you to show us the way to bring our girl home. Amen

12/26/08 10pm

OK Lord, You are CRAZY! Just this afternoon I prayed for a way to move ahead-and just 2 hours later we received a gift a $2000 gift for our adoption! I am overwhelmed with joy. YOU are amazing! Please show us which way to go from here...



image

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Buh Bye Homestudy!

Today, I said good bye to an old friend, my bulky, heavy, homestudy binder.

No longer, will I have to see you, homestudy, sitting on my desk or countertop, listening to you plead with me to finish you and send you on your merry way. Today, I delivered you to your home with the social worker.

I feels odd to not have this nagging feeling "you should really be finishing up that homestudy paperwork" today, for the first time in almost 3 months! I am so happy to have it out of my house! It feels like our first official landmark in this journey.

Next up: the home visits (which means, I need to get my house clean and babyproofed...even though I already raised one baby in this house and never did it)! Looks like we'll get our homevisits done in January at this point...I am feeling a little lighter today! Yipee!

And, One more plug for TOMS shoes, and I'm done. I just think it's so cool that this company matches shoes, one for one. You buy a pair, a pair goes to Ethiopia to a child in need. How great is that?!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Yay for my blogger adoption friends!

My blogland friends, Amy and Andrea both found out today that they passed court, and OFFICIALLY are parents of beautiful Ethiopian baby girls, AND get to go GET them in January! HOORAY!!

Saturday, December 13, 2008

TOM's shoes

So, there is this really cool company, called TOMS shoes, and for every pair of groovy shoes you purchase, they give a pair of shoes to a child in need...right now, they are campaigning for 30,000 pairs for kids in Ethiopia! These would make a great Christmas Gift for someone in your life...Check out TOMS!

I want these for me, and then the second pair for my daughter to be!

Friday, December 12, 2008

New Friends



L-R-Leslie, me, Courtney, Lori, Abe, Amy, Joy, Autumn, and Beka. Tuesday, I ate my first Ethiopian food (and liked it alot)! I had a really neat opportunity to meet up with a group of gals the other day, the thing we have in common? Ethiopian babies!! It was so fun to meet some gals with the same heart and passion. there were 8 of us in all, 2 who have brought thier little ones home already, and 4 of us in the process, and 2 who are thinking about, but are a part of the Ethiopian Orphanage Sponsorship through Children's Hopechest. It was so fun to lay my eyes on a amazingly handsome little man, Abe and meet his mommy Lori. I so enjoyed chatting, and connecting with these women, talking about our experiences, our agencies, where we're at in the process, and just getting to know eachother a little bit. So fun, and I'm really looking forward to doing it again sometime.

Then, Yesterday, Lori and Abe were nice enough to let us come over to thier house and play. Lori and I attempted to chat about adoption while our kiddos interrupted us, but it was SO nice to talk in depth with someone who's actually done this thing, and would do it again. So, thanks, Lori, for letting me pick your brain! It was a real blessing to me for you to spend that time with us.

I am looking forward to getting to know all these gals better through our journey!

AND these are some seriously talented gals. Amy and Josh wrote a book-Ashes to Africa that will be released in February of 09. I have only read the introduction on the website, but I can tell it will be a must read for me.



Autumn, makes adorable banners and baby dolls (I can't wait to order a personalized one!) on her etsy shop, proceeds of course benefit her adoption. check it out here!

Sunday, December 7, 2008

My baby is two!!

Seriously, I can't believe it. I feel like it was just last week that he was born. My big big baby boy.

Jack was born at 9:30 am 2 years ago! A whopping 9lb 12 oz. I loved that the doctor asked me just before I was wheeled in to the OR, how much I thought he'd weigh. I said 9lb 11oz. (He was 12 days late, and I knew he'd be a, shall we say "generous" size)

Right after he was out and weighed, Dr Eric, said..."you were right! (technically he was like 9lb 11.6 oz, they rounded up)"! Mom's always know!" It made me feel good, right off the bat, to have known my boy better than anyone. To this day, he's a mama's boy all the way!

This morning, when Jackers woke up, he came out and I said, "Happy Birthday, big boy!" and he gave me the biggest, longest, loving hug ever. Squeezed tight around my neck...my favorite kind.

Here's a birthday note for my baby boy:

Dear Jacker...

Oh, boy I'm already crying thinking about how much my heart is so full right now. YOU are such a special boy. You and I have clicked right from the start. You are my snuggley buggley boy.

Since you could control those chunky little hands of yours, when I'd rock you before bed, or while nursing, you'd reach up and touch my face with your little hands. So gentle and soft, just rubbing my face. When you were a little bigger, you'd want your cheeks, right next to mine while we snuggled. You'd reach up and pull my face to yours with your arms...skin to skin. To this day, you hug me so tight and give me sweet lovin' kisses all the time, many times a day, by your initiation. When I tuck you in at night, you say "UG, mama" (aka...HUG) and you squeeze my neck tight and make these little sounds that tell me you savor the moment as much as I do. When you want to snuggle you still grab my face and rub your little hands on my cheek. You and me speak the same "love language"...physical touch!

I am loving this phase of you the most of all. You are all boy...sticky, dirty, smelly feet, the whole bit. You are mischief and independant, but you'll sing to me whenever I ask. You make up little tunes, and hum them to me at bed time. We were at a friends house awhile back and you just came up to me on the floor, and gave me a big ol' Jack hug. She said, "Wow, is he always like that?" and I said yes...you are so loving! I get unsolicited "UG"s all day long.

You are talking up a storm, a little parrot copying whatever your big brother says. "What doing, Mama?" you asked me tonight when I was decorating the christmas tree...you're so curious and inquisitive. You love balls...you think everything is a soccer ball, no matter how much Daddy tries to teach you about basketball. You are pretty coordinated, and love tossing and catching balls, riding bikes, and run, run, run, every chance you get. I think you're a little musical, you love to sing. Whenever we're in the car, you love to sing along or make up your own tune while we drive.

I pray that as you grow, your loving heart will turn to compassion for others. You are so quick to love on others, I can see that turning into compassion and serving those who need to be loved on. You are stubborn, yet really likeable. I pray that determination will be used for God's glory and that you'll be able to harness that passion and give it to God for his use. I am thankful every single day, for such a loveable boy, who shows me everyday, that you love me too. There are so many days, when I'm struggling to keep it together, and you'll reach those little arms up and say "UG, Mama" and squeeze me tight. It makes me stop in my tracks and say, "Wow, thanks, Lord. I really needed a good hug to change my heart." You are so good for my soul, little man. Your tender heart is good for mine.

I love you so so much, and I hope those good "Ug's" never stop. They make my day, everyday. I love you, big boy!!

Love, Mama

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

My Mom is the most thoughtful...

She sneaked behind my back while working at the bazaar with me a few weeks ago, and had this amazingly cute diaper bag custom made just for me! I am in LOVE with it! It is soft brown cordouroy (how do you spell that?) with really fun sassy fabrics to accent...I love the pink and red one the best! It's so cute and girly...I don't even know what to do with myself! For now, it's full of all my other cute girly things, waiting for a cute girl to go with it!

Thanks mom, you are the best (and sneakiest!)I love that you're just as excited about this baby girl, as all the other grandkids!

It's made by my new friend Julia over at julesbydesign-journal.blogspot.com or her etsy shop...it is so nicely made, and exactly what I would have picked for myself!! I love, love, love it. Can't wait to fill it with little bottles, and pink girly binkies, diapers, babies, and blankies...oh Lord, please bring her to us soon!

ps...if you didn't see my other post today, you MUST see my dirty boys.



BOY: (noun) a noise with dirt on it.

I saw this plaque the other day that I need for my wall. That so fits my boys!
I was out shooting pics of a friends little guy yesterday, and there happened to be perfect jumping puddles nearby, so of course, my guys indulged (at first, I was thankful I'd remembered to put them in thier boots...then after a bit, it didn't matter anyway. They both had to ride home in the diaper and undies cuz they were soaked!)
(EDIT: I don't normally make Jack wear a helmet while playing :) REALLY, he had been riding his bike!)








And here's my two faves of Mr. Cha-Cha, one of my very best friends little guy, who just turned two!

Monday, December 1, 2008

Not Me Monday



For starters, I would never go a whole week without updating my blog! No, not me!

I would never forget that I was supposed to make the favorite family cinnamon rolls for thanksgiving morning, that EVERYONE was looking forward to, not me!

I also would not forget that I had started two HUGE batches of turkey broth at the end of the day, and the fall fast asleep on the couch when I sat for the first time on thanksgiving day, forgetting all about it until the next day, when it had turned to turkey jello (that would be disgusting and shamefully wasteful!)

I would never procrastinate this late on sending out birthday invitations for my baby's second birthday on SUNDAY!(even if I did send an evite)

I would never leave my kids unsupervised in the tub so I could run and check my email, long enough that the littlest one would have time to poop and then the older one throw it out of the tub onto the floor so they could keep playing without poop in the bath water...that would NEVER happen here!

I would not take my children out of the house at 10 am still in thier jammies, into the grocery store. Not me! If I ever did do something like that, I would bring clothes to get them dressed before meeting grammy for lunch.

I would not make a batch of pie crust dough, just so I could have some of those pie crust scraps with cinnamon and sugar on them like my mom always makes, and pretend it was for my kids to get to cut out fun fall shapes with cookie cutters and decorate them like cookies. No, not me!

Oh, boy...I am SO glad I never do things like that!

Monday, November 24, 2008

Not Me Monday


My friend Julie does this every Monday...and I'm looking forward to getting some things off my chest.

I most certainly did not clean my minivan after MONTHS of neglect and find a banana peel so old, it was black and crisp under the back seat. I would never let my car get THAT gross.

I would never consider going to the craft store with my two tired children at 7pm, and bribe them to behave with a bag of DUM-DUM lollipops, because that would never work. Nope, not me! I would know better.

AND FURTHERMORE, I would never ever buy 12 yards of flannel, with the intention to sew every child I give christmas gifts to, thier very own, homemade flannel jammies and matching pillow cases, one month before Christmas. NO, NO, not me!

NOR would I allow my darling babies to eat animal crackers for breakfast, because I was out of cereal and milk, and I was too lazy to cook something like eggs or oatmeal. No, not me!

I would not let myself get so overloaded with laundry that my mom would have to come over out of the goodness of her heart and help me fold MT. KESLER of laundry in my family room. NOPE...I am way more on top of things than that.

How about you? What would you never ever do?

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Kebebtsehay Children's Home

Kebebtsehay is the name of the orphanage that we are helping sponsor in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, as a part of the Children's Hope Chest. It is so exciting that 90 families have committed to sponsoring a child! There is 120 children at this home, so there is still a need for more families to join. Please check out these links and pray, asking God if he is leading you to join this really cool opportunity. Just $34 a month will provide physical, emotional, and spiritual care for these sweet children. Here's a video of kids at the Kebebtsehay Children's Home. 


This is a really neat online community, that I'm so looking forward to being a part of and learning as we go. I'm looking forward to being a part of a community with the same heart for orphans, and annual opportunities to travel there in the future as a "family" to love on and meet our sponsored kids.

Here's a couple of links to another blog, with a few more details on what this sponsorship will entail. 

Thursday, November 20, 2008

family fun





I had the privelege of taking my sweet cousins family photos this week. (one of the many ways I'm trying to earn extra cash for adoption!!)

It was so fun, and let me just say this little Miss M...those eyes, WOW. So blue and sparkley!! She is a very happy girl, with easy smiles (makes my job easier!). I had lots of fun, and her mom and dad are pretty awesome, too. They have really blessed us by supporting our adoption in BIG ways. 


ps, if anyone out there knows how to put that watermark on photos, I'd love to know. 

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Blankee Sale and I got 2 new puppies!!


Remember my super cute custom Blankee I had made from My Blankee? They are pretty fancy, and definitely a splurge, but they are on sale again for 30-50% off. Several folks commented about wishing they'd known about the sale, so here you go! www.myblankeeinc.com


In Other news, I caved. I have said never never do I want to have dogs. (i'm not a huge fan of dogs, but I do like Golden Retrievers...mostly, I have enough poop to clean up after in my life, and really don't care to spend money on dog food...enough said. No offense to you dog lovers!)

But today ,these 2 cute little puppies were just too irresistible! I brought them home, gave them doggie bowls and let them lay on my floor. They are much easier and much more obedient that my kids....



JUST TO BE CLEAR....I don't make my kids eat off the floor....they were pretending to be puppies.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Check it

I copied and pasted this from another blogger site, but it is such an awesome opportunity to help an orphan. Matt and I are joining this cool movement called Children's Hopechest...read below!




Incredible Opportunity!

Are you an older married couple who are done with the "kids" stage but desire to be a part of an orphans life?

Are you a married couple who are done having children but want to be "long distance" parents to a little one who has none?

Are you a young single whose not ready for marriage and children but understands the incredible need for caring for orphans and wants to be involved?

Are you someone whose never considered being involved in helping the estimated 143,000,000 orphans in the world but feels maybe this is something you should pray about?

Do you desire to be involved in a community that is part of an orphan care ministry but your church has no involvement?

Well we have an incredible opportunity for you! Children's Hopechest and Red Letters Campaign are partnering to launch holistic orphan care in Ethiopia!! Yes, this is child sponsorship but it's so much more than that! Here are the 5 key areas in which the children will be cared for:

1. Spiritual Development. These kids will have a personal counselor/discipler to meet with weekly. This is HUGE when it comes to an orphans life. Yes, a life without parents, but a consistent adult in their life to show them love and guidance.

2. Physical Needs. This is pretty self explanatory...food, water, shelter, clothes, ect.

3. Education. They will have wonderful education and will even get help in finding and applying to a university! This will also extend to skills training, learning how to interview for a job, ect.

4. Medical and Dental needs. Keeping the little ones healthy. :)

5. Emotional Support. The life of an orphan can be extremely stressful. These little ones will be loved by the incredible caretakers.

All this for $34 a month. $34 a month??!! Just give up a couple lattes and a few other things you don't need each month and a child with no future has hope and love and health and more!

Personal contact with your child will be much more personal than the average sponsorship. You can write them letters and there may even be access to email once in a while. You will receive a couple yearly updates on how they are doing and will be able to give money for them to have a birthday and Christmas gift. Another incredible opportunity will be the annual trip offered to go visit your child and their orphanage!! I think this is an incredible addition and will help build the community even more.

"The Community" that I am mentioning will consist of people from all over the states who are sponsoring a child at the same orphanage as you. RLC will be an online place to go and get to know each other a bit and keep up to date on our orphanage and children.

Without good orphan care these little ones could very likely end up on any of the following paths:

-prostitution (which could very likely lead to death from AIDS)
-drugs (also could lead to death from AIDS)
-death from a preventable illness
-sex slavery


But a child who experiences incredible orphan care and knows that someone far away loves them and prays for them...these kids could become the most incredible leaders in their country...the brighter future of Ethiopia. I truly encourage all of you... friends, family, fellow adopting parents, stalkers :), random visitors...to think and pray about this and then ACT!

And finally, if you choose to sponsor a child with this community you will be involved with some really fun people. Like me for instance. :) Or Amy. Or Beka. And of course many other really cool people but I don't want to speak too soon for them. You can email me if you are interested or have more questions at jesseandjoy@hotmail.com or contact Amy (she is in charge of putting this online community together) at amyde63@hotmail.com.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Bazaar Update...

i for one, have too many blogs going. I can't remember what I posted where.

Anyhow, i have been crafting my little brains (and a few other loved ones brains) right out of our little heads. I'm so tired, I just may fall off this chair.

I had a table for e.k. inpired today at a local bazaar, and I'd say, overall it was a success! I broke even on my "investment", and I still have enough goods for another bazaar, so there is profit to be had! It was really fun spending the day with my mom and some sweet friends who stopped by to shop. I have been so blessed by people in my life, giving thier all to support us in this adoption.

This week, I've been feeling kind of down about the adoption process. It seems like just when I'm feeling the end of paperwork draw near, i realize that there is ANOTHER thing I need to send away for. Another signature needed. More money going out than coming in...UGH. Then as soon as i question "is this really what we're supposed to be doing right now?" God answers me with a big FAT "yes". I had been feeling bummed this week (maybe emotional from having my "monthly visitor" and working my tail off to get ready for this bazaar and juggling MOM's ministry and kids and family too)...My sweet cousin calls me up and says "Hey, can we stop by for a quick visit?" I say sure, thinking, that's kind of odd, she never just stops by for a visit. Her an her hubby hang out for a bit visit, catch up. I give them a thank you note for thier big fat contribution to our garage sale...and they say, "speaking of that...we have something for you" and proceed to hand me another big wad of cash for the adoption fund. ONCE again, I'm speechless at God's faithfulness. They affirmed me, saying they really feel God telling them to get behind us and support us, and they will continue to do so until Baby Girl is home with us. I started to cry, and shared how down I'd been feeling, wondering if this is really the right timing. She said that they had a busy day, and had considered putting off the visit until Monday, but after a quick discussion with her hubby, they just felt a "do it now" feeling and they came over. We were all blessed and glad they did! God is so good provide confirmations for me when I really need them. I am so blessed by my cousin and her hubby's obedience to God's call for them to support us, and bless us in this process. It is so cool to see God move to provide.


OK, back to the bazaar, I met this super sweet gal, name Julia, who makes THEE CUTEST BAGS. They are so stinking cute, and really nice quality. She designed them herself and they are just so great. Check her out, she's awesome! I really want this bag for my diaper bag with new babe girl
and one similar to this for a super cute purse (it has the cutest red with

blue flower lining inside that I LOVE)

Friday, November 7, 2008

Goodnight Mom, with apologies to Margaret Wise Brown

My sweet sister in law, Steph, gave me this poem for giggles tonight when I went to pick Jack up from her house. (THANKS for letting me go squeeze the new baby A-L-O-N-E)

If you have read Goodnight Moon, 10,000 million trillion times like we have, you'll appreciate it!

GOODNIGHT MOM
(with apologies to Margaret Wise Brown)
By Sarah Jio, Parenting




In the messy green
family room
There was a telemarketer ringing the telephone
And a crying toddler
because his brother just popped his
red balloon
And a picture of--

The cow jumping over the moon (which someone colored on with permanent marker)
And there was a missing
teddy bear, and a girl with
gum in her hair

And one to be scolded
And laundry to be folded
And a very hungry spouse
And something stinky in the house
(that no one else seemed to smell)

And a comb and a brush and a colicky baby who just won't shush
And a frazzled mommy screaming #*%#@

Goodnight messy room
Goodnight scribbled-on moon
Goodnight cow getting out while she can
Goodnight telemarketers and the
popped balloon
Goodnight long-gone teddy bear Goodnight cereal bar smeared all
over the dining room chair

Goodnight spitup
And goodnight leaky sippy cup
Goodnight much-too-little house and goodnight grumpy spouse
Goodnight comb and goodnight brush
And goodnight to a certain 4-year-old who just needs to hush right now I mean it

Goodnight Elmo
Goodnight toys we'll pick up tomorrow,
or the next day
Hello chardonnay and TiVo--
"me" time finally



AND my friend (and amazing artist) is having a fun blog giveaway, check it out here

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Love and Logic MAGIC-saving my sanity!!


So, one of our recommended readings for our homestudy is "Love and Logic, Magic for early childhood" by Jim Fay...and let me say, it IS Magic!!

I have read the first few chapters, and been implementing the principles with Hayden for the past 2 days...and truly, they have been the best 2 days we've had in MONTHS with him. (or should I say, I have had with him). 4 years old, has presented a few challenges with our big boy. He suddenly is Mr. Independant, wanting to "do it on my own" (or NOT do it on my own as the case may be...) I have been pulling my hair out, given many timeouts and, I'll be honest, alot of yelling, trying to get him to stinking pick up his toys on his own....

So, the magic book talks about giving kids lots of choices. ie, do you want cereal or oatmeal for breakfast? (giving 2 choices that I'd be happy with either choice) CHOICES CHOICES CHOICES. Blue socks or white? Sweatshirt or fleece? boots or tennies? This story or that one? Literally, give choices on everything. They are control hungry little animals. So, give them some control where it really doesn't matter. THEN when it does matter, for example, It's pouring down rain, and Mommy chooses that he wears long pants instead of shorts. Mommy has given you lots and lots of choices today, and now it's my turn to make a choice....and...he totally went for it! Yahoo!!

Another principle, react to thier mistakes with empathy and compassion instead of anger and frusteration. Anger and frusteration literally shut down thier ability to learn and think and make a good decision. Anger and frusteration turn on the "fight or flight" reaction in thier little brains, and kick in the adrenaline and they just can't think rationally. If you respond with empathy, ie, "uh, oh. Your brother is really hurt from you kicking his face, How can you make this better? What should you do differently next time?" It has been working like a charm, and we are both SO MUCH HAPPIER. I am finding alot of freedom from my own frusteration in discipline with these tools.

I'm learning that my heart needs to be focused on equipping him to be a good decision maker. How can he make good decisions if I have all the control and never LET him make decisions? He is loving having a say in what happens, and those are very "affordable" choices. Then when the really matter, I get the control I need as the parent. As L & L puts it, mistakes at 4 (or 2) are very affordable mistakes. At 14-17, they may not be so "affordable". I need to let him learn now, because by the teenage years, If I suddenly give all control to him with no training and practice at making good choices, it will not magically kick in when he's faced with choices like, "To smoke pot, not to smoke pot" or "skip school or not to skip school"...or worse, but I'll wait a few years to think about those possibilities :) Saying this stuff outloud, it all sounds so common sense-ish. I guess I have a very think (and stubborn) brain. I am loving this book, and it's principles really worked for H and me, almost instantly. He's usually grouchy in the morning, and today he came out with a big ol smile and said, "Good Morning, Mommy!"...later this afternoon, he said, "Mommy, you're AMAZING!"...Now, who doesn't love to hear that! Giving him so many choices throughout the day, has made him so much easier to get along with , and I found myself this afternoon, just wanting to spend time playing with him....we were just plain ol' having fun together. We toasted pumpkin seeds, snuggled and watched a movie, read stories. We just enjoyed eachother's company.

The other MAJOR victory for me has been in getting him to pick up toys on his own, specifically LEGOS. I love that he loves creating things with Legos and he's getting pretty creative. I HATE the million tiny peices all over the carpet and him not wanting to clean them up. I have started saying, "OK buddy, I have a couple choices for you. You can pick up the Legos now, and then you can play again later, OR Mommy can pick them up for you, and I will keep them."...He is just smiling and saying, "OK, I will pick them up so I can play with them later when I want to."


MUSIC TO MY EARS. Thank you Mr. Fay for the Love and Logic MAGIC!!

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Fall Funsies

I took my fellas out to play in the beautiful fall crispness this past week. Here's a couple of my fave shots!





One more thing...I fell in love today. With these. I should've bought a case of them (it's probably good I didn't)....if you've never had Trader Joes Joe-Joes, they are like an OREO but SO MUCH BETTER. And, there's no nasty hydrogenated oils.ANYWAY, These are like an oreo, (but better) with tiny bits of real candy canes in the creamy part. I am a total sucker for anything chocolatey and pepperminty, but these are now at the top of my list. GO TO TRADER JOES AND BUY THEM, you won't regret it (unless you hate chocolate and minty deliciousness).

Friday, October 24, 2008

photo booth

We got a new computer (well, new to us). I gave my old girl a hard knock life, and she was very, very tired. So my new imac has this cool thingy called photobooth. Basically, you take goofy pictures of yourself and can do all kinds of distorted things to yourself. Here's what I like to call Hot Mama. Thank goodness I got a gift certificate my sister in laws salon for my birthday! Those eyebrows are looking AWESOME. I emailed this one to my hubs at work, just to entice him.
And here's some pop art, courtesy of Hayden.


and our favorite, "Hi, my name is Chubby"

And, my sweet baby boy.

Oh, the things we do for entertainment, while waiting for an adoption...:)
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